Let me emphasize at the beginning that these reasons are not only applicable to leadership. They're true for all life issues. There are seasons in our lives we become unteachable.
The basic truth is: the reasons someone becomes unwilling to develop individually may not always be the same. In fact, there may be several reasons why people fall in that category.
However, there are four basic reasons people avoid learning to enhance their growth.
1. They don’t think they need to learn anything
This one negative attribute frustrates the leader most, and it’s the one we accuse people of the most. It’s true, arrogance is common in leadership, but also among those who need to be led. Many leaders feel they are in a position because they are the only ones who could do the job. Everyone around them may know it’s not true, but they can’t see it. They don’t care to learn from others, because they're unwilling to admit or see they have anything to learn. Sometimes those who should learn to improve their skills are too proud to admit it.
2. They don’t know they need to learn anything
This may sound very similar to the first, but this is a different reason. It isn’t arrogance that causes this one, rather ignorance is at play. We’ve all been there one time or another. Many times I’ve assumed I had the answers already. It's not because I wasn’t interested in learning more—I just didn’t know there was more to learn. The reality of life is that the more you learn, the more you see your ignorance. Some of these come with maturity and age. Some of it come with experience. However, many times we don’t think we need to know anything new, because we don’t see enough missing holes in what we already know.
3. They don’t want to learn from you
This is a hard one for leaders to accept, but it’s very common. It could be a relational issue or a positional issue—it might simply be a personality clash, but for whatever reason, it keeps them from desiring to learn from you. I have especially seen this one when the leader was once a peer to a person they are now trying to lead.
As a parent, there were seasons when my children learned more from others than they did from me. I welcomed it and was appreciative of those who spoke into their lives. This is also true when someone was supposed to be leading me, but I discovered I knew more about the subject than the resource person. It takes a very humble person to learn from those they’re supposed to be leading. I’ve had times when someone on my team hears the same thing at a conference I’d said for months. Don’t be offended if those you're leading are not always listening to you to learn more. However, make sure they are listening to someone else and improving themselves.
4. They want to learn on their own
There’s nothing wrong with this, as long as they remain teachable. In fact, this part should be encouraged once in a while. Some of the best lessons in life come from self-discovery. If they're being arrogant, give them the freedom to explore independent of you. It will help you, them and the organization.
However, regardless of the reason—you can’t teach someone who doesn’t want to be developed.
This is why the best leaders I know—the best teachers—maybe even the best parents—spend as much time motivating the learner as they do teaching them.
In the book Switch, authors Dan and Chip Heath call it “motivating the elephant.” Your job as a leader, if you desire people to willingly learn from you, or even from others, is to motivate them to do it without undue pressure.
How do you do that?
Here are five suggestions if you want people to listen and learn from you:
1. Value The Person
No one follows someone willingly who they don’t believe cares for them. Zig Ziglar’s famous line “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care” is very true.
Don’t expect people to willingly learn from you until they know you have their best interest at stake and that you care for them personally—not simply what they can do for you or the organization.
2. Paint A Great Vision
You have to give people something worth following. It needs to stretch them, while still being attainable by risk, faith and hard work. When they know there’s a glimmer of hope to the finish line, they’ll be more willing to learn what it takes to attain it.
3. Communicate It Frequently.
Even the best vision fades over time. People get bored. Andy Stanley uses the phrase “vision leaks.” If you want to maintain your audience of followers, you have to keep reminding them why you are doing what you are doing.
4. Tell Exciting And Compelling Stories
People are motivated by example. They want to know what they are doing makes a difference. People will be more likely to seek your input if they know you are leading them to something valuable and important.
5. Share The Reward
People only feel valued when they get to celebrate the victory. If all the recognition goes to the leader, the follower feels taken advantage of to some degree. If you want people to keep listening—listen to them—share the credit.
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