CHARISMA

Do you know what draws people to you? What are the qualities you have that draws others to you? Extraordinary leaders have this one quality. It is a quality we all have the potential to develop and it has the power to step us up for outstanding success. We can boil and distill it down to one word: Charisma.

Charisma as a subject is ignorantly detested, mostly in religious circle. The explanation is that it is associated with pride. Far from it! Two definitions I cherish so much about charisma are: "The ability to inspire followers with devotion and enthusiasm." The other one is, "A divinely confered power or talent."

Everyone of us has certain abilities that can increase the charisma of our personality. You don't have to make a strained effort to become something that is not comfortable with your basic nature. However, if your desire is to become "man of the people," then you need to develop an appealing personality that causes others to respond to you. I have personally decided to be very concerned about my dressing because that's the first thing people notice about you.

We can learn so much if we consider the word CHARISMA as an acronym:

C- Concern

H- Help

A- Action

R- Results

I- Influence

S- Sensitivity

M- Motivation

A- Affirmation

Don't be too excited yet. It is important I mention here that the above traits are not simply inborn. However, they are attainable by anyone who cares about other people and wants to develop his or her relational skills.

Let's consider each of the traits carefully:

•Concern: This is the ability to show care.

Charismatic people have the ability to show concern for other people's deepest needs and interests. That does not mean you can push them around. It means they exercise empathy.

During any event, you'll find two categories of people: those who possess an attitude of "Here I am!" and those who possess an attitude of "There you are!" it doesn't take much time to notice that people flock to the "There you are!" people.

Jesus had great concern for people during His earthly ministry. He was highly compassionate in His dealing with the public. He was a "There you are!" person. That's one reason the multitude always followed Him everywhere He went. Jesus went, saw, felt and cared. That's the secret of His success. It's only when we go and expose ourselves to various situations that we will see enough to develop the concern necessary to move us to action.

It is difficult to become motivated to help people without first seeing and feeling their needs. The secret is to spend time with them. It is only when you go and see will you feel and do.

•Help: This is the ability to reach out.

‎Simply put, charismatic people are helpers. They are out to see others profit; they have the gift of grace. In fact, the Greek word of gift is "charisma" meaning "gift of grace."

Romans 12:6 says, "And since we have gifts that differ according to the grace given to us, let us exercise them accordingly." Ephesians 4:11-12 also supports this: "He gave some as apostles, and some as prophets, and some as evangelists, and some as pastors and teachers, the equipping of the saints for the work of service, to the building up of the body of Christ."

People have problems. Many are like the discouraged and depressed man who, in desperation, went to a psychiatrist for help. He told the doctor, "Every time I get my act together, the curtain falls down." He needed help. Truth is, if you have the ability to solve problems, you'll be guaranteed to have followers.

What can you do to help people solve their problems.

First, encourage them to face their problems. Too often people would rather flee them, fight them, or forget them.

Second, encourage them to solve their problems. Use the following acronym to teach yourself to help people with difficulties.

T- Tell them it takes time

E- Expose yourself to their problems

A- Assure them of your confidence in them

C- Creatively show how to deal with it

H- Offer them hope through the process.

•Action: The ability to make things happen
Something exciting always seems to be happening around a person with charisma. The charismatic person has an aversion to being boring. He or she may be controversial, unusual, or entertaining, but never boring. Be honest with yourself and evaluate how you come across to others. During a church service, a young member turned to his mother and said, "Pay the man and let's go home!" That preacher obviously lacked charisma.

When the foremost evangelist John Wesley was asked why people seemed to be drawn to him, he answered, "We'll, you see, when you set yourself on fire, people just love to come and see you burn."

Do you want to increase your interest with people? Develop your creativity and confidence. Creativity is the ability to say things in an unusual way; confidence is the ability to do things in an unusual way. Charismatic people can do both.

As a speaker and a pastor, I always want to be fresh and exciting in my presentation. I will use humour to drive home a point but never to distract from the truth. Long after the content of the message is forgotten, people will remember the creative illustration and the truth that was emphasized.

•Results: The ability to produce
Charismatic people want to be on the winning side of life. People like being around winners and want to play on the winning team. A boy playing chess with his grandfather says, "Oh no! Not again! Grandpa, you always win!"

Grandpa says, "What do you want me to do, lose on purpose? You won't learn anything if I do that!" But the boy replies, "I don't wanna learn anything, I just wanna win!"

Charismatic people do not just want to win, they want others to win too. That creates productivity. That brings us to the question: how does a person becomes productive? Find out the area of your strength and find someone who needs it. Charismatic people use their strength to help other people who need it; they are people-centred. The person who is self-centred uses his strength to dominate others.

•Influence: The ability to lead
Leadership is influence. If something new, exciting, and interesting is happening in your life, you will want to share it. In doing so, you will influence others and they will want to follow your lead. What happens to you, speaks of your circumstances. What happens in you, speaks of your character. And what happens through you, speaks of your charisma.

Do you want to learn how to be a positive influence on others? Five factors come into play:

*Who I am - My position or title
*Where I am - My position or job
*Who I know - My sphere of influence. People open doors of opportunity
*What I know - My expertise. This will keep you in a position long after who you know wears off.
*What I do - My production, character and credibility.

•Sensitivity - The ability to feel and respond
Charismatic people have the ability to feel and respond to changing situations. They are adept at taking advantage of the mood, feeling, and spirit of any situation. Most people have the ability to feel something, but they aren't sure how to react to it or express it. Charismatic people not only feel it, but they know how to react and express it.

Charismatic people find a cause; that's discernment. They also voice a concern; that's courage. And they draw crowd; automatic.

If you're to become sensitive, you must be willing to take a risk. People who are overly sensitive to the point that their feelings are always hurt will withdraw from others and never take a risk. But the charismatic person will risk getting out of comfort zone in order to make others feel comfortable.

•Motivation - The ability to give hope.
The secret of motivating others is providing them with hope. People tend to feel more positive when they are following charismatic leaders. Let's look at some Bible characters who offered hope:

*Isaiah, speaking of God, said, "I will do something new"(Isaiah 43:19).
*Jeremiah talked about "...new law in their hearts"(Jeremiah 31:33).
*Jesus spoke about being born again(John 3:3).
*Paul called the Christian experience "a new creation"(2Corinthians 5:17).
*John's vision recorded in Revelation spoke of a new heaven and a new earth(Revelation 21:1)

Each of these dynamic leaders constantly waved hope before their people.

Do you convey hope or despair to those around you? Learn affirmation skills, problem-solving techniques, ways to verbally encourage others, and convey belief and support in others.

•Affirmation - The ability to build up
Charles Schwab, the successful businessman, said, "I have yet to find the man, however exalted his station, who did not do better work and put forth greater effort under a spirit of approval than under a spirit of criticism."

Everyone wants and needs to be affirmed for his accomplishments. A little boy playing darts with his father said, "Let's play darts. I will throw and say, "Wonderful!"

We tend to become what the most important person in our life thinks we will become. Think the best, believe the best, and express the best in others. Your affirmation will not only make you more attractive to them, but you will help play an important part in their personal development.

How do we affirm others? First, we need to feel good about ourselves. Then we can verbally and actively believe in others and expect them to respond positively. People are our own appreciable asset. As Christians, we cannot afford not to affirm them. If I fail to affirm a brother, we both lose.

ROADBLOCKS TO CHARISMA
Again, charisma is a trait or quality in our life that can be developed. It is not reserved for those who are extroverts and enjoy being in front of others. The potential to be charismatic lies within each of us, but first we must remove hindrances from the development of this important personality characteristic.

The following are some possible obstructions to being a charismatic leader:

*Pride: A proud person will have the tendency to look down on other people, feeling a sense of superiority. People will not follow or identify with a snobbish personality who is conscious of status and position.

*Insecurity: Insecure people are not willing to take risk. They prefer to remain comfortable and probably, unexciting.

*Moodiness: This is an immature quality which is detrimental to personal relationships. Moody people are fickle; they cannot be depended on. Confidence cannot be built upon a person who is subject to sullenness.

*Perfectionism: Perfectionism is an obsessive need to perform faultlessly. It stifles creativity and freedom, and it turns people away. Perfectionists can rarely affirm themselves; therefore, it's very difficult for them to affirm others.

*Over Sensitivity: Oversensitive people are constantly licking their wounds. They look inward and are not aware of the needs of others. Naturally, people don't flock around them.

*Negativism: This is the opposite of charisma. A person with a constant negative attitude is depressing to be around. Their personality says no to life in general. Others will avoid a person like that. There is no possibility of being a charismatic leader when no one wants to be around you.

Finally, charisma is a trait or quality in our life that can be developed. That potential lies within each of us.